4 Emotions That Make you Want to Overeat & What to do Instead
September 2016
Emotions are messengers, carrying to us information that is essential for our bodies, minds, and spirits to process. How convenient is this? Our very own information-carriers working to help us make sense of the world around and within us. Feelings are not necessarily facts, but they are worth being aware of and paying some gentle attention to. They serve a real purpose in our lives and it does not do us well to ignore, deny, suppress, repress, or eat them.
Eating for any reason other than physical hunger is not only self-sabotaging, but never actually addresses those underlying emotions of why we may be overeating in the first place. And it's very common within the realm of addiction to replace one addictive habit with another (for ex., quit drinking or smoking and then start overeating) or to have a negative relationship with food altogether. That's how it was for me. My eating issues and drug abuse issues came from the same place but still had to be addressed separately.
I’ve outlined the 4 most common emotions that cause people to turn to food and what you might do instead of overeating:
1. BOREDOM: Eating from boredom usually looks like snacking, grazing, picking, a.k.a. mindless eating. It’s the repetitive reaches into the nut bowl or the chip bag, without realizing we’re doing so. It’s the empty candy wrappers we suddenly notice surrounding us after an hour of zoning out on the TV. Boredom eating occurs when we are bored, obviously. The antidote to boredom is PURPOSE. Purpose comes from being deeply connected to something we love. Sometimes this is a job, a calling, or a hobby. If you don’t know what brings purpose to your life, think about what you love to do, what you are drawn to, what makes you feel excited. We deserve to do things that make us come alive.
2. SADNESS: Eating because we’re sad is a lose-lose, since more food beyond what is necessary makes us feel physically inert and the emotionality of sadness is already pretty heavy. We can all call to mind the girl who is knee deep in an ice-cream container after a break-up. The best way to counteract sadness-induced overeating is MOVEMENT. It doesn’t have to be a 5-mile run or anything extreme. 10 jumping jacks if you’re stationary or a brisk walk to the mailbox or around the block to get some fresh air will do. Both will get blood pumping through the veins and reduce the feeling of sadness and lethargy. And don’t underestimate the healing powers of a good cry to release the weight of sadness.
3. FEAR: Fear is an umbrella term which may include irritability, anger, anxiety, restlessness. I think it’s one of the major reasons that people overeat. We are scared, anxious, or irritable over whatever is going on in our life and so we eat more food to ease our high nerves. We don’t have to look at the reasons behind the fear so long as we are focused on the food. The way I’ve found to get past this is to sit still. Ask yourself: What am I afraid of right now? We have to step right into the fear and feel it. As soon as we feel it and allow it to be there, it begins to lessen. Once we are still, we can confront it, reflect upon it, and then accept it. We cannot do this if we are in a frenzy of fear or anger. STILLNESS can mean actual meditation, or just stopping whatever you’re doing to check-in with yourself. A couple deep breaths or your favorite prayer will also do the trick.
4. LONELINESS: Feeling lonely is another reason people find themselves turning to food. Food simply provides comfort. We can take it too far when we use food as a substitute for relationships with others. Food is not friendship or companionship. The remedy for loneliness is CONNECTION. We can feel closely connected to someone on a one-to-one basis, such as by having coffee with a friend. We may also open ourselves up to conversating and connecting with people throughout our day: the grocery store cashier, the mailman, the neighbor walking their dog. Any human contact where you meet eyes will establish the sensation of connection. We also feel connected when we are a part of something, for example: a group (can be online), a class, a workshop.